Today is one of those days when I’m not sure one of me is enough. Yesterday round two of cold and flu season hit our home. Sid and Reese are both sick with fevers again. And these fevers are MUCH higher than the first time around. Ugh. This makes week FOUR of someone being sick here. Heck, I’m still not myself and it’s been almost two weeks since I first got sick. This YUCK lingers! On top of two girls down, George is getting his wisdom teeth pulled today. I got out of bed incredibly early to make sure he ate a huge breakfast since he can’t eat 8 hours before his surgery. I know he’s 18 now and could have made his own breakfast but he’s still my son. Moms lose it a little when it comes to the words CHILD and SURGERY. Well, at least I do. So needless to say I made him breakfast. Which was fine because I was awake anyway. I was up most of the night with Reese who was extremely restless. I was happy though, I was finally able to fall asleep for about an hour. YAY! Then it was time to wake up to do Libs’ hair for choir portraits today. She had to be at school early today. Of course she did. OY. But somehow I managed to get her to school UNUSUALLY early with her backpack, tennis bag, choir dress and hair and makeup done. Nothing forgotten! A miracle, if I do say so myself.
At some point today I’m going to cry. I just know it. My guess is when they take George back to have his teeth removed. I’ll have a moment alone and a second to breath. Let’s just hope it’s more tearful rather than blubber-y.
Clearly most of this crazy day piled up by no fault of my own. I scheduled George’s surgery months ago and we just found out about the portraits. And SICK happens whenever it happens. My friends and I joke that when I have a stressful day it’s not like everyone else’s normal scoop of stress. It’s got extra toppings, HA!
Days like this I am in awe that God trusts me so much. When I look in the mirror I see just one small woman. But God has put some major love, tenacity and determination into this little frame of mine. He’s packed me with everything I need to get through days like this. And I’m grateful. So, so grateful.
Well, I hope you all have a day where you feel like SUPERMOM!!!
I am not invincible. 2016 beat that into me more times than I can count. There were attacks on my family, health issues, loss of relationships, and a roller coasters of change. I’m not saying that 2016 didn’t have quite a few high points, it did. Blessings were abundant. And I am thankful that most of the issues that presented themselves were resolved. I just needed to weather the storm. Lots of them actually. And those storms were pretty darn rough.
Despite having felt vulnerable, broken, weak, disappointed and scared, I am somehow ending this year with my spirt intact. There were MANY moments when I didn’t think I’d ever feel like myself again emotionally. Physically, I’m getting there and I know in my heart that I will be completely restored in this area too. I really couldn’t be more grateful.
It took me a while to emerge from the darkness of 2016 but when I finally did I felt something wash over me. I’ve always been a pretty cautious person and planned as much as I could throughout my life. But after a lot of soul searching and reflecting on 2016 events I realized that without some serious guts … I will never have any glory. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want fame or any craziness like that. But I do want to achieve some pretty lofty personal goals. And without some bold moves, they aren’t ever going to happen. I see that now. Worry and overly cautious behavior has no place in my life now. None.
I’m not a big resolution maker. But I do love new beginnings and the coming of the new year is exciting to me. As I’ve written before, I like to come up with a New Year mantra. They motivate me and remind me of what is important to my heart.
So after all I’ve survived in 2016 I think it’s time to dig deep and find out what I’m really made of. I’ll use the strength and tenacity that I found this year to make 2017 exactly what I want it to be. Maybe even more. I won’t back down. I will be brave and courageous despite what life throws at me. I’ll also add an element to all this that I’ve never added before. Something that grew out of pain, stubbornness, feeling fed up and being totally OVER IT. Yes, last year broke me … but God gave me the ability and the time to not stay that way. And I don’t plan on taking any of it for granted or wasting one second of my restoration. I will always be grateful for the defeat I felt in 2016, because in those moments of complete and utter brokenness I became a little more edgy, daring and determined. A combination I can’t wait to put into action.
Well, I hope you all have a YEAR where you become FEARLESS!!!