Holding it in …

I have tried EVERYTHING to keep myself busy these past few days. Sid and George are heading home for Thanksgiving and I am SO excited! This is when I tend to want to text and call them A LOT to plan everything out. What do they want to do? What do they want to eat? What do they need? I could go on like this for days! They have both had very busy schedules the past few weeks so I told myself that I couldn’t be excessive leading up to them coming home. Which has been ROUGH! But I wanted them to be able to get all their work done so that they could feel relaxed and enjoy themselves when they got home. So I have worked, baked, cleaned, shopped, watched Christmas movies, made lists, and checked them twice (HA) all in an effort to stay out of their hair and not drive them crazy with my excitement. Well, with George driving home today and Sid flying home tomorrow night I no longer have to contain my excitement! YAY! Thank goddess, because it was getting painful.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you don’t have to hold it in!!!

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A hand to hold …

As of yesterday afternoon my world finally calmed down. Yay! It’s honestly been a whirlwind. A wave of relaxation literally washed over me after my last meeting yesterday. Last night I realized that I’ve been so busy that I hadn’t really even given much thought to my favorite holiday fast approaching. Even after decorating, confirming with George when he would head home and after booking Sid’s flight it still hadn’t hit me. Talk about distracted!

I had big plans today. Plans to nurture myself. THIS is so important. Seriously, we all need to do more of it. But that’s a topic for another day. My day started early with a wonderful carefree run. I prayed. I thought about Thanksgiving. I thought about how blessed we are and how thankful I am. And then it hit me! ALL of my babies will be home. SOON. I was instantly overcome with emotions. I have not been with all four of my kids at the same time since early August. That’s a first. Again, I don’t like it but I wouldn’t want it any other way. They are off living their lives and becoming who they are meant to be. It’s beautiful.

The picture I posted with this blog is quite a few years old but it’s one of my favorites. I’d be lying if I said that I don’t miss those days. I do. They were days when we were all a bit younger and life wasn’t pulling us in so many different directions. I’m not one to want to turn back time, but I do like to look back. It makes me appreciate our togetherness even more now. I love our family history and the memories that we have made. They are, after all, what paved the way to what is our now. Again, it is beautiful. I know that our NOW might not look like our THEN but it still takes my breath away. These incredible souls are my WHY. I am blessed to be their mom. So so so blessed. And I am grateful that regardless of how much time passes or the distance between them, that they will always have each other to walk through life with. As an only child I wanted this for them. No. I needed this for them. And knowing that they have each other fills this mama’s heart with immeasurable peace and joy.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you have a hand to hold!!!

Accomplished …

I have been around the motherhood block a few times. This makes my twenty-first year Halloween costuming little people. Some years it was ugly. There was a lot of last minute craziness. There were even Halloween day trips to overcrowded picked over stores that came with it an ugliness that remains indescribable with words in the English language. After what I have seen and endured to ensure my kids looked adorable, I can assure you that there are few finer moments than when a mother stands before a completed costume (prop and hair color included) the night before Halloween.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you feel accomplished!!!

Looking back and moving forward …

This morning I was looking at my Facebook Memories and realized that 5 years ago today Sidney and I attended a traveling college open house event. She was at the beginning part of her junior year and this visit would be the catalyst to more than I could have ever imaged. This would eventually be the university Sidney would choose to attend.

In the post I struggled with all of it. I guess nothing has changed there, HA! But it was amazing to see how much time DID change things. I remember that day perfectly. It would be the beginning of so much; a pre-college stay on campus, tours of the city, the application process, a portfolio, her senior year of high school and what would come to be her final year at home. What a journey it has been. To see how much she has grown is incredible. She has accomplished much. As I progressed through all of that with her I could not deny that she was on the right path. She FIT perfectly through every door that was opened for her. I watched her fall in love with all of it. And because she had the courage to take a chance on herself she has now created a wonderful life for herself. Despite being so young at the time my baby girl chose her future wisely. She listened to her heart and committed to nurturing and growing the gifts and talents God gave her. And in what seems like the blink of an eye … “my baby” girl grew up.

Five years.

A lot can happen in 5 years. Nothing in our lives looks the same as it did back then. Applying this knowledge to our futures fills me with a sense of excitement, but also with a little MOM sadness too. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss the simpler times when my big kids where little. I do. But watching them mature and seeing them chase their dreams and achieve their goals brings me overwhelming amounts of joy. I have mentioned before that this process comes with many ups and downs for me. I don’t do any of this gracefully. I feel my way through it. I’m thankful that my kids allow me to SIT with all of it in my own way. After all, it’s not just them who has been growing in all of this. I have learned and changed too. I am honestly fascinated at how so many lives can grow together yet still be on their own personal paths. I have come to believe that THIS is what life and love should look like when they are set in motion over a lifetime. And I don’t think I have ever been a part of something more beautiful.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you look back and move forward!!!

Orderly …

I am horrible at math. No, really. I am THAT person. But strangely, I love numbers. I can’t exactly pinpoint what draws me to them, but I know it when I see it. And I’ll be honest, sometimes it only makes sense to me, HA! I mention all of this because today is my daughter Sidney’s birthday. She was born at 10:21 p.m. on 10/22 and today she turned 21 years old. How cool is THAT?!?! I like how that all looks and sounds! It’s just all so number-y! I believe I will also enjoy the heck out of her next birthday and maybe even the one after that … 21 … 22 … 23!

Well, I hope you all have a day where you are orderly!!!

Too excited to sleep …

I couldn’t fall asleep last night and I woke up at 3:30 a. m. this morning.

WHY?!?!

Because after two months away at college I FINALLY get to see my son George today. It’s his university’s family weekend. YAY! And get this! Sid has arranged to spend some time with me today too! I get to spend time with BOTH my big kids! WOO HOO!

Well, I hope you all have a day where you are too excited to sleep!!!

Lay DOWN …

UP late (regrets). Slept a little (not nearly enough). UP super duper early with a child (she was cold and needed cuddles). Slept for a few more minutes (does that even count as sleep?). UP again, at a later early, because of my unwavering and reliable alarm clock (why do I feel so betrayed?). UP. UP. UP … ugh.

Well, I hope you all have a day where all you want to do is lay DOWN!!!