That hot, hilly, and windy 20-miler was so much fun (said no runner ever) …

Today I ran my 20-miler. I have been physically and mentally preparing for it all week. This is a big one. Huge. I couldn’t wait to get it under my (fuel) belt. And then I woke up.

I woke up to the sound of wind. As I started to get ready I realized the wind wasn’t letting up, so I checked the weather report. High wind advisory. SWELL. I already knew I would be racing against time to avoid the heat, which wouldn’t be an easy battle because I mapped out 10 miles of hills for myself. Wind was not going to make anything easier. Not. At. All. But I laced up and got out there anyway. Somehow I survived and lived to write about it. Here’s how it all went down:

Mile 1: The wind appears to have died down. Run woman run!

Miles 2: I was wrong … the wind did not die down.

Mile 3: Suspicious stranger sighting. I’m glad I have my pepper spray but with all the wind I figure using it could backfire. I determine I can out run him. My paranoia subsides.

Mile 4: My left hamstring woke up and is pissed we aren’t still in bed. I also come to the realization that everyone in my neighborhood is still asleep. I am overwhelmed with jealousy.

Mile 5: 10,000 steps. Whatever Fitbit, whatever.

Mile 6: Gusts. I hate them and all the debris that comes with them. Ouch.

Mile 7: I wonder why I didn’t register for the Donate Life 5k that is this weekend. It’s practically in my backyard. Then I realize I would have had to run it over 6 times to get all my miles in. I calculate 6 race entry fees. I am happy I can still do simple math. This skill will be dead to me soon.

Mile 8: Cyclists pass me. I notice all their butts. I conclude that my butt is too big to fit on a bike seat.

Mile 9: The downhill. This is just mind trickery to build my confidence … the REAL hills are coming.

Mile 10: I’m at the gates of Hell. Let the hill repeats begin.

Mile 11: Branches are falling from the trees. Sure let’s make this a terrifying obstacle course too. Because I obviously need THAT in my life.

Mile 12: Blood, sweat and gagging. I REALLY hate hills. Oh and MORE WIND.

Mile 13: If wind was a person I would call it a bad name … and punch it in the throat.

Mile 14: I’m pretty sure everything is chapped.

Mile 15: What fresh hell is this?

Mile 16: Pulling out the big guns. Electrolytes with extra caffeine. This will either get me to the end of this run or give me a heart attack. At this point I see it going either way. 

Mile 17: A brief encounter with feeling TOTALLY BITCHEN. In your face haters. I GOT THIS.

Mile 18: BITCHEN feeling gone. I start my run home. I remember that it’s uphill. I am running into the sun and have a constant headwind. I cry a little and question my sanity.

Mile 19: My ability to do simple math is gone. Everything hurts. I am pretty sure running is very bad for you.

Mile 20: DONE. Elated and thankful. It is over. I did it. And I am pretty sure that once the feeling of wanting to throw-up leaves my body I will want to eat my weight in donuts.

The 20 miler. Even under the best of circumstances I have never found this distance easy. Today was unbelievably hard. It beat my tush. But I have learned over the years that if I try hard enough I can find humor in even the most difficult runs. I gotta say, I like that about myself.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you laugh yourself through some tough times!!!


Foam rollers, no pain, no gain …

I’m in training for the Clif Bar Mountains 2 Beach Marathon. Needless to say I’ve been getting a lot more miles logged on my legs. Not more than I’ve ever done before, just more than the past 4 months have allowed. It feels great to be back at it. But it also freaking hurts! Seriously. Everything from the middle of my back to the tips of my toes is in pain on some level.

I think marathon training is a lot like having a baby. You forget that the actual physical experience can be UGLY. One way I combat my soreness is using a foam roller. For those of you who are unfamiliar with what a foam roller is, I’ll explain. It’s a modern day torture device used by athletes that I’m sure has its’ origin from some time during the Spanish Inquisition. OK, fine … I am joking. But it feels that way. It is so painful to use but it does have a purpose. Here’s what came up when I googled:

“Foam rollers are exercise devices used for massage and fitness. … When used for self-massage, they help soothe tight, sore areas (known as “trigger points”) and speed up muscle recovery. This process of rolling out tight muscles and relieving tension is also called myofascial release.”

OK, so basically you roll yourself out like dough and it’s supposed to be really good for your muscles. Think along the line of necessary suffering. And by suffering I mean it hurts like hell. HELL HELL. Like even Satan questions whether these things are ethical to use. These beasts hurt but I’ll admit that they certainly do help. Once you get past all that wincing and sobbing.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you have an intimate understanding of “no pain, no gain”!!!

A melting drama queen …

It can be a BAZILLION degrees outside and it won’t bother me one bit. But make me cook in an air conditioned house on a hot day like today and I feel I’ve been banned to the depths of hell. Seriously, I make no sense … and I’m a little dramatic.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you don’t feel like a melting drama queen!!!

It’s hot and even I am OVER IT …

I am not one to complain about the heat. I usually LOVE IT. Seek it. I mourn it when it’s gone. Ummm, but the last time I checked it was 106 degrees at 4:13 p.m. … and it’s OCTOBER 9th!

Come the heck on! That is not normal. Right. Or just. I have one question: Did we all die and go to HELL?!?!

Well, I hope you all have a day where you are OVER IT!!!


Proving my love … 

After this one NO ONE will EVER question my love for Libs. Not. Ever.

Libs wanted to cycle at the gym tonight. She had never cycled on a stationary bike so instead of going to pilates and yoga tonight we decided to cycle and run instead. I would run my miles while she cycled hers.

Now if you know me, this speaks volumes on how much I must love my child.

First off, I can not stand doing my runs at night. I am just too wiped out from my day to even go there. Not gunna even try. Nope. And there is only one thing that I hate more than running at night. It’s the treadmill. Day or night, I loathe that thing. LOATHE. Combine the two and then add in the hellaciously hot humid sweaty air in the gym and I am pretty much in hell. Yep. HELL.

But … I would do anything for that kooky kid.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you prove your love!!!