Happily growing older …

Yesterday I found myself explaining how elated I am to be turning 50. I know that may sound absolutely crazy to a lot people, but if you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m not like most people. I’ve never been one to focus on my age. I’ve actually spent most of my life focused on my mortality. Having a mom who died in her mid forties after battling breast cancer twice taught me that life isn’t so much about longevity as it is the quality of time you have here. But it also scared me A LOT. I honestly never new if I would make it to see 50 especially dealing with meningitis … twice. OY. But despite it all, here I am. Healthy. Fit. And feeling quite blessed. I am honestly surprised I made it, HA! So how can I be anything less that overjoyed? I’m surrounded by incredible friends and family and I’ve been given the most wonderful children in the world. And God has graciously given me more time to share with them than I ever expected.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you are happily growing older!!!

Advertisements

GONE SUMMERIN’ …

Today is Libs and Reese’s last day of school. I seriously can’t be happier! From about 1 pm this afternoon to the end of August, if you need us, you can find us out making some lasting family memories. And in this mom’s heart, that is just THE BEST!

Well, I hope you all have a day where you’ve GONE SUMMERIN’ !!!

Our summer story …

It’s (almost) the most WONDERFUL time of the year! Tomorrow is Libs’ and Reese’s last day of school. Thank you SWEET BABY JESUS! It has been a long DOOZY of a school year and these girls need and deserve a break.

Summers look a lot different around here now. With Sid in San Francisco full time and George home from college but working, it’s definitely not the summers of our past. Gone are their days of early childhood. Thankfully, because of Reese, we are still allowed glimpses of them peppered into our every evolving lives. I cherish these moments that keep us connected to those carefree times. I wish that they were as abundant as they were, but I have learned to take what I can get. And trust me, I am grateful. Because even though they occur differently now, they are all still so precious to me. So. So. Precious.

As I look back over the past school year I am reminded of how quickly time passes. People grow out of routines. Life simply changes. Again, I am thankful. And even more so that this family of mine, just seems to roll with it. I am the one who hangs on tighter to the past. Which is silly because, as painful as I find all of this sometimes, I have found that change has never let me down. I have learned that as the pages of time continue to turn, it allows us to write new and adventurous tales into our family history. It is a perspective that has not come easy for me. But I’m continually feeling the comfort it brings me. It is nice to know that nothing is truly ending … it’s just the beginning of another new chapter.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you begin to write your summer story!!!

I couldn’t have done it without them …

I want to say all of this today, since tomorrow I will just be too busy (and scattered). My heart is so vested in these words that I fear that if I start crying that I might not stop. So if I wrote them tomorrow that would be bad because Sunday is race day.

This will be the first full marathon I will run since I got sick. I’ll be fighting a lot of demons out there Sunday. Yes, I can run. I’ve proved that time and time again. BUT can I run THAT distance again? Do I still have what it takes? I honestly and fearfully don’t know.

But with the love, support, guidance and encouragement of my family, friends and doctors, I get to find out. It’s a miracle I have been given this chance again. And I do not take any of it for granted. It is because of these incredible souls that I am even willing to try.

It’s hard to put yourself out there like this. REAL hard. Even under the best and healthiest of circumstances it takes all you have. Being knocked down physically has only made this task more difficult and one of the biggest mental challenges I have ever faced. But I promised myself something years ago when I took a chance on running seriously again. If I do this, I won’t give it up. I wouldn’t do that to my heart again. Running matters to me. It is the part of me that propels me into a fearlessness that I have never know otherwise. And I don’t want to let it go. Not ever.

The point of all my emotional rambling (HA!) is to publicly thank each and every person who has walked through this season of life with me. The season that robbed me of so much, but gave me back even more than I could have ever imagined.

SO without further adieu … to those beautiful souls who have cheered me on, from those first steps that I took with my walker, to the start line this Sunday morning … I humbly and genuinely thank you for believing in me. I couldn’t have done all of this without all of you.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you feel eternally grateful!!!

Happily never knowing …

We are a busy family. We always have been. I think it’s because there are so many of us, HA! In my 20 years plus of parenting I have never felt like we have done TOO MUCH. I felt like I have maintained a balance between school, fun, work, rest and health … but not this school year! It’s been crazy and it only got worse as the year marched on.

At the beginning of Spring I sat down and looked at everything on our calendar. To say I was completely overwhelmed, is an understatement. There was just too much going on. Some of it was our norm, but a lot of new things were on our agenda and they came with a lot of learning. Then there were other “one time” events that demanded priority. Throw in holidays, a vacation, college open houses and marathon training and you have the past 8 weeks of our lives. YIKES. At the time I took a deep breath and prayed for health and time in each day to get it all done. And I’m relieved to say that as of this past weekend we got through it! Except for my marathon this coming Sunday. HA, again! Some people might think that would be the worst if it. But not me. I’m looking forward to. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy. It absolutely won’t be. I’m saying it’s going to be freeing. I love to run and to be able to go into this week feeling at ease after weeks of stress and wondering how I was going to fit in my training miles … I finally just get to run.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you happily have no idea how you did it!!!

Hoping it all goes beautifully …

It’s been 24 years since my mom passed away. But I’m going into this weekend feeling pretty good. I’m not sure what that will mean come Sunday, but it’s honestly the first Mother’s Day I’ve looked forward to in … ever. It’s always a tough one. I remember the first one without her like it happened yesterday. It was awful and to be honest I struggle every year. I’m so thankful that my family understands and let’s me just feel it out. And this year I’m feeling pretty optimistic.

Well, I hope you all have a day where you think it’s all going to go beautifully!!!